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 How to be a manly man

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breakyoudown
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PostSubject: How to be a manly man   Fri Aug 28, 2009 6:31 pm

After long amounts of research and data gathering I have some tips on how to be manly

Never say the following words: Hoorahy, Delightful, Blossom, or that is such a treat
Especially blossom. Girls blossom into women, butterflies blossom from cocoons, flowers blossom. You should not be talking about flowers in the first place, you're a guy. However, you can use these terms sarcastically. If someone asks for you to turn the sports game off to watch something about clothing you can say. "Oh yes that sounds f***ing delightful. That is a REAL treat." And nobody says hoorahy unless your 10 and you have no friends

Also, never change your favourite team. The kind of man who switches from his favourite team cheats on his wife or flip flops in politics. Don't do it

Birthday, celebrate them, like you'd celebrate Tuesday. You loved birthdays when you were a kid : the presents, the cake, the surprise, the clowns, the friends...And then you turned 12. You cannot care about this. You mustn't, because it isn't a accomplishment for living. Buddies will say 3 weeks later, oh yeah happy birthday dude. And that is all, that is perfectly cool. Now if a girl friends birthday is coming up you are physically unable to not know it. Because there will be a 60 day countdown and facebook updates and msn screen name changes everyday

Colours. Men see three colours: Red, yellow, blue. Anything else is just a variation. If your girlfriend asks "Hey do you like the maroon curtains, or the burgandy curtains?" You must say..."I guess maroon" because maroon sounds like harpoon, which us men automatically know how to use on instinct. We don't know what magenta is, it sounds like a superhero from the X-men. We also hate curtains- destroy the curtains

Also navigation. Do not use a GPS. How can we trust a artifical lifeform as opposed to our superior instincts? We are never lost driving, we are just enveloping the environment and taking side routes to avoid traffic. Men know the direction without a superficial technological "help". Although, the computer does show potential and I respect that. So I will take it when I am....looking to spread my knowledge of the crazy inventions that we don't need.

Also family is important. "A man who goes against the family is not a real man" Remember it

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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: How to be a manly man   Fri Aug 28, 2009 6:49 pm

This is spectacular.

We must destroy the curtains
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PostSubject: Re: How to be a manly man   Fri Aug 28, 2009 7:25 pm

i use a GPS....im a lowly homo

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breakyoudown
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PostSubject: Re: How to be a manly man   Sat Aug 29, 2009 2:09 am

Using a GPS is okay, if you more than an hour away from your house

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MarshallEMG
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PostSubject: Re: How to be a manly man   Sat Aug 29, 2009 11:04 am

I use a gps only when i go to new places... I can remember exactly how to get there after that
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