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 Death is not the End (poem)

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Shady
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PostSubject: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:46 pm

<removed>


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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:49 pm

That was fantastic man. I love poetry, but I'm not too good at critiquing them. Just good job man
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:52 pm

That's a very good poem Shady. In such a short time period (one breath and one sigh) you covered so much. Everything fits together. It's great.


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Shady
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:52 pm

Thanks man it really means alot, it always makes me really nervous when I post poetry incase people don't like it so your feedback is really important and I really appreciate it.
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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:54 pm

It's fantastic man. Every poem you have posted (can't remember how man, it's been a few) have been phenomenal. I'm still too nervous to post any poetry I've written lol
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:55 pm

I can't blame you Axe I think I'm going to be shaking in my boots for a while now too. It's like when you're doing class presentations and your project is the worst crappiest looking one and the kid that goes up right before you has the absolute most awesome project ever. I've been in that situation sooo many times lol.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:57 pm

lol I've come to expect that my projects are going to be dirt.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 4:58 pm

Axe, i'm nearly in tears man lol, in real life I'd never be able to show people poetry but here I know there are people that wont ridicule me over it but will always post honestly and truthfully their opinions and I really can't emphasise enough how much this forum has done for me and my poetry and dont be nervous to post your own work I would love to see it.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:01 pm

I may just post some of it sometime....

I love this forum for the exact same reasons. I don't understand why this forum can be so accepting and so polite about everything, but most of society isn't. See, I try to talk about music to people I know in my city, and I usually get made fun of for liking folk metal and stuff. Here, people don't make fun of you if they don't like it.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:17 pm

Oh, and + rep for sharing
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:41 pm

This half-stanza is incredible. I love this.

This final breath, seemed distant a prospect
Life seemed so eternal, deathsĺ stage not yet set
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:45 pm

I don't know about you but it's weird for me because I don't just sit down and write poetry when I feel like it, i'll be doing something random and next thing I know I think of one good rhyme and work around that so the max I've ever spent writing a poem is five minutes, I find it practically writes itself after that.

EDIT: Except for the poem I wrote for Hate, that one I had to spend awhile on but it was worth it.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:51 pm

My poems pretty much write themselves lol. I have a thought, and I start writing, and it's done when my thought process is done
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 6:07 pm

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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 6:09 pm

Oh thanks I was actually thinking about going back and reading them. You read my mind.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 6:12 pm

I just read them slowly and all I can say is I hope you keep on doing this. They are really good both in message and expression. wow.
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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 9:22 pm

This poem is good

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PostSubject: Re: Death is not the End (poem)   Mon Sep 14, 2009 12:52 am

I see deep, dark forests, where trolls and giants live.
I see streams and brooks, where fish and sea people lives.
I see Ăgirs daughters ride, with foam spray over open seas.
I see field and open moor, where wood nymphs and elves live.
I see sun and moon ride, from the land where I live.

I hear the past gloomy sound, like calling from the deep forest.
I hear elves song in the waters trickle, by streams and the brooks shore.
I hear shore lost sailors moans, when the waves roar strike in over beach.
I hear music in the winds whisper, when I wander over the field.
I hear the nymphs whisper in the night, and childplay in the days light.

I feel lost souls search, when I walk in the deep forest.
I feel the world wisdom mirror, in the water from brook and stream.
I feel the urge to travel and homesickness power, from the big, indomitable sea.
I feel the past roasted runes, from stone and old hill.
I feel longing, love and sorrow, like the sun follows the moon.

I know my life has to be lived now, because I dont know my death.
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