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 Skeptecism (A Poem)

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Axe
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PostSubject: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:17 pm

Why have you forgotten us?
The people that live
We run through each day
Time flies past, carrying our dreams

Hopes are crushed
transformed into nightmares
but life continues, perpetually
We have no choice

Straying from the divine course
We learn to fend for ourselves
But something is missing
Isn't it?

Life doesn't change
False thoughts become bitter
Have you forgotten us?
Or have we forgotten you?

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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:23 pm

You could have copied this off a famous poet man that's brilliant and I really mean that, would love to hear more of your poetry.
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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:31 pm

lol thanks man, this is one of my favorites because it's about a trial I've faced recently in life. I was telling VR that my poetry is usually abstract like this, because for me I like poetry to be pure thought and emotion. I love using literary devices in poetry, but I'm happiest when writing them when I can just copy down what I feel, and not edit it. I rarely edit my poetry. I will post some more here in a little bit. All of my poetry is in notebooks, so I have to type it out before I post it

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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:37 pm

I really like it Axe. I'm trying not to sound too positive but it's hard not to. I just like the message I think it's direct paints the picture. I get the image of a person just like walking to the grocery store and having to go through hell before even getting the chance to get started on homework or anything and then writing this out.
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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:41 pm

It's one of my favorites, because I've faced that trial in life, and am facing it. I'm at a point in my life where I am caught in the middle. I don't know if I believe in God, if I trust in God, or if I'm against God. I don't know if I'm at a point where I think human existence is just human existence, or if there is a God.


The poem is really about me. It's about how I turn away from God, but at the same time i have a feeling in my gut that I need to embrace God. It's still happening, I haven't found the answer yet, and that's why I love this poem. It's both questions, and I think it really describes existence for anything really, whether you believe in God or you deny God

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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 5:46 pm

You're very honest with yourself. That's my favorite quality in a person. People get caught up by whether a person thinks this or thinks that but all I really care about on the personal level is whether they are being honest with themselves.
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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:58 pm

Desire's my saying
Final's my appearance
Care-worn's my glance
Apathetic's my devotion

through yearning rises
out of deep dark chasm
up to deceased brightness
with the original power of life

a black feathered bird
trips softly in the surge
a last sunbeam illuminates
in a bleeden darkness
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breakyoudown
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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 9:26 pm

This poem is good

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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 9:34 pm

IB that is really really good. Hope, then disappointment, then apathy. I really like the first two lines of the last verse.
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Axe
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PostSubject: Re: Skeptecism (A Poem)   Sun Sep 13, 2009 10:15 pm

breakyoudown wrote:
This poem is good

Thank you son. Oh and IB, that poem was also very good. I'm going to read it again

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