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VacuousReality
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PostSubject: Good taste jokes   Tue Sep 07, 2010 11:29 pm

A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to
when they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said he'd make a deal: 'You bring your grades up from a C to a B
average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about
the car.'

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer, and
they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, 'Son, you've brought your grades up and
I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm disappointed you
haven't had your hair cut.

The boy said, 'You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in
my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long
hair, Moses had long hair...and there's even strong
evidence that Jesus had long hair.'
---- his father replied, 'Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they
went?


And everyone's favorite...

Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other:

"Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron"

The first atom replied, "Are you sure?"

The second atom exclaimed, "Yes, I'm positive!
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Tue Sep 07, 2010 11:54 pm

Your joke is bad and you should feel bad
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Tue Sep 07, 2010 11:59 pm

That's not a joke Taxer.

This is a thread for jokes silly.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 12:01 am

It's called observational humor VR
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 12:08 am

LOL!

"You suck and everything you say sucks."

"Huh?"

"It's a joke."

-Inspired by Taxer
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 12:10 am

i sent footage of the holocaust to america's funniest home videos

The tape was labeled "Body by Auschwitz"
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 12:12 am

VacuousReality wrote:
LOL!

"You suck and everything you say sucks."

"Huh?"

"It's a joke."

-Inspired by Taxer

Pretty lulzy when you put it that way
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 2:57 am

VacuousReality wrote:
LOL!

"You suck and everything you say sucks."

"Huh?"

"It's a joke."

-Inspired by Taxer

That one's my favorite! OMG I can't believe you've heard it before!
And the jokes have to be in good taste? Fine. I guess I don't have anything to contribute to this thread.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 3:12 am

Mista Conthulha wrote:
i sent footage of the holocaust to america's funniest home videos

The tape was labeled "Body by Auschwitz"

lold. thats good.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 3:13 am

Dammit Axe LOL!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 4:04 am

Barack Obama

Hahahahahahahah. Oh man, that one cracks me up everytime.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 2:26 pm

Dies Irae wrote:
Balack Onigger

Hahahahahahahah. Oh man, that one cracks me up everytime.

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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 3:40 pm

How do you fit four cows in a car?
Two in the front and two in the back

How do you know there's a cow in the fridge?
The doors open because it doesn't fit.

How do you know a cow has robbed you?
You left the door unlocked


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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 4:52 pm

How do you know a cow is mad?
because they MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTHERFUCKING GET TO BE TITFUCKED EVERYDAY By Farmers...

(yes it sucks and no i dont care )
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 4:53 pm

"did you hear the news? an escalade with 4 nignogs in it drove off a cliff yesterday"
"shame.."
"why?"
"an escalade seats 7"
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 5:47 pm

Is your server running?
"Yes"
Than you better go catch it!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:02 pm

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get away from all these fucking horrible jokes.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:24 pm

how do you fit 50 jews into a VW beatle?
2 in the front seats 2 in the back seats and 46 in the ashtray
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:32 pm

Folk Metal
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Wed Sep 08, 2010 8:47 pm

Taxer666 wrote:
Folk Metal
Hahahahaahahahaahaahahhhahahaha!!!









































































































































































I don't get it.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:58 pm

How do you fit 4 babys in a Bowl?
Get em in the blender.
how do you get em out of the bowl?
DORITOS :p
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 8:56 pm

You guys suck lol.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:03 pm

"Good taste" jokes end up being anti-humor jokes.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:04 pm

What's black and white and swings through the jungle?
A fridge.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:07 pm

Darkflame wrote:
What's black and white and swings through the jungle?
A fridge.

Not my favorite kind of anti-humor but it's anti-humor nevertheless.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:14 pm

Non-punchline vs. No punchline
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Thu Sep 09, 2010 9:27 pm

VacuousReality wrote:
Non-punchline vs. No punchline

I like the ones that are all build-up and no punch-line. Remember the ~5 min one that Zhenya did? 'Twas epic.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:00 pm

Sure Jesus loves you, but does he swallow?

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?
Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands!

Jesus is coming, but he pulled out..
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:05 pm

A twenty-something disabled girl with no arms or legs is sitting in her wheelchair one day in a park. All of a sudden she starts to cry. A man walking by sees this and walks up to her. He then asks her why she is crying. She replies "I'm nearly thirty years old and I've never been fucked! Will you help me?"
The man can't resist her, she's weak, helpless and bawling her eyes out. So he agrees.
He proceeds to push the chair and says that they're going to go somewhere special. They soon arrive at a nearby beach and the man hires a small boat. "How romantic", the girl says. The man lifts the girl out of her chair and seats her in the boat. They then row out some distance.
"I told you I would help you and now I will." The man gets up and the girl has a look of excitement on her face. The man picks her up and throws her overboard. "NOW your fucked!" he says and starts to row away.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:24 pm

ImendiaBurzum wrote:
A twenty-something disabled girl with no arms or legs is sitting in her wheelchair one day in a park. All of a sudden she starts to cry. A man walking by sees this and walks up to her. He then asks her why she is crying. She replies "I'm nearly thirty years old and I've never been fucked! Will you help me?"
The man can't resist her, she's weak, helpless and bawling her eyes out. So he agrees.
He proceeds to push the chair and says that they're going to go somewhere special. They soon arrive at a nearby beach and the man hires a small boat. "How romantic", the girl says. The man lifts the girl out of her chair and seats her in the boat. They then row out some distance.
"I told you I would help you and now I will." The man gets up and the girl has a look of excitement on her face. The man picks her up and throws her overboard. "NOW your fucked!" he says and starts to row away.

Haha that's tasteful for sure. Kind of like the "how do you eat a vegetable?" "remove the wheelchair" joke.
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:44 pm

ROFL.
like this one

How do you know when a cabbage is boiled??...The wheelchair floats to the top
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PostSubject: Re: Good taste jokes   Fri Sep 10, 2010 3:54 pm

what is this I dont even...

1. If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
2. If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
3. If there is no God, who pops up the next kleenex in the box?
4. When a cow laughs, does milk come out it's nose?
5. Why do they put braille on the number pads of drive-through teller machines?
6. How did a fool and his money GET together?
7. If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon to the pan?
8. How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
9. If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
10. What's another word for thesaurus?
11. Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
12. What do they use to ship Styrofoam?
13. Why is abbreviation such a long word?
14. Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
15. Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
16. How do you know when it is time to tune your bagpipes?
17. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
18. When you choke a smurf, what color do they turn?
19. Does fuzzy logic tickle?
20. Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?
21. Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the special olympics?
22. Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
23. Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
24. If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
25. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
26. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
27. Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
28. Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
29. Is it possible to be totally partial?
30. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
31. If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
32. If a stealth bomber crashes in the forest, does it make a sound?
33. If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
34. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
35. When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
36. Should vegitarians eat animal crackers?
37. Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
38. Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
39. Why isn't "phonetic" spelled the way it sounds?
40. Why do people sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" when they're already there?
41. Why do people say "tuna fish?" They don't say "beef mammal" or "chicken bird!"What's another word for synonym?
42. So what's the speed of dark?
43. Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
44. If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
45. Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
46. Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?
47. Why is it that in the US: If you take off all your clothes and walk down the street waving a machete and firing an Uzi, terrified citizens will phone the police and report: "There's a naked person outside!"
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